Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Monday, May 18, 2015

Wow! I'm a Uni student!

So, I have one seminar left and 3 essays to submit, and that is the end of my first year at Loughborough University.
Here I am at nearly 39 years old and I'm a uni student! It still freaks me out (wow, really not good English for an English student!).
Walking through campus today in the rain, reminded me of the Open Day I attended last June. Back then I was only dreaming of being a student, but that day I was so inspired, I knew I wanted it to be a reality. Today, I called my mum and neither of us could believe it had been 11 months already. Time flies when you are too busy to clock watch.
I still get a thrill walking through the library looking for books, just like I did that day 11 months ago. I love sitting in lectures learning something new and discussing books with other book lovers.
I have read so many amazing new books, and a few really dull ones.
The staff have been both incredibly supportive and great at encouraging you to be the best you can be.  And I have met 18 year old students that have amazed me with their maturity and intelligence.
I still have 280 credits to go, which will probably take another 3 1/2 years and my classmates this year will be finished in 2 years but I will have had the time to enjoy my new career and spend time with family and friends.
I say now that I would like to combine my career in supporting adults who have a mental health diagnosis with education but I'm also flexible on seeing where this takes me. My life is my own and I have the freedom to go anywhere. So I'm going to continue to enjoy my life as student and my career each day, for as long as it lasts.
Isn't that all we can do? There is no point in worrying about what might happen, just in case it doesn't. Then you would have wasted all that energy for nothing.
I find it hard to get really, truly excited about my new life, whilst living with the guilt of who I hurt to achieve it though. I can only hope that time really does heal.
I'm still not sure I fully understand what makes a poem a poem. Oh, and there have been so many deathly boring, totally confusing essays on Critical Theory! Thank goodness my last Critical Studies lecture and seminar was today. Though I have discovered a new interest in Psychoanalytic literary criticism, Structuralism is still baffling to me.

Friday, May 15, 2015

I changed my life this time last year. I also changed someone else's; a man I'd loved for 8 years. Some might think I'd taken that decision lightly, those who say you should have worked at marriage harder. They assume people walk away too easily. Do they consider though that working hard at marriage sometimes means sacrificing happiness and contentment? Aren't we all entitled to find happiness in life? 
And yet to find my contentment, I sacrificed my husband's happiness. I pulled the rug out from under him. 
And I think about that every single day. I go to bed and lay there thanking my lucky stars for my amazing life, whilst also thinking about my wonderful husband and our once idyllic life that I shattered. 
My friends and family give me support and say 'if I'm happier now, then it was the right choice'. His friends and family probably say 'what a bitch' and 'how could she do that to you?'. They are both right. 
When we stick up for our friends and knock the other person's decision because we can only see the hurt one, shouldn't we think first about the reason behind that choice? 
Or maybe I am a selfish bitch? When I cry myself sleep at night thinking about the man I left, am I just having a pity party? Or have I right to mourn what we had, even if I was the one who made the choice to leave?

Thursday, December 5, 2013

The luminaries review

The Luminaries is pretty hefty coming in at 832 pages long but if you love big books and especially historical fiction, this is perfect for you.

The story is a mystery set in the gold mining town of Hokitika, on the west coast of the South Island of New Zealand back in 1866.
One man is found dead, another is missing, and a working girl is found unconscious in the middle of the road plus there is $4000 of gold found in the dead man’s hut and a previously unknown wife who arrives to claim it.
Walter Moody arrives in town and finds himself in the confidence of twelve men in the back room of a local bar on the evening he arrives. They all have their own suspicions as to what has happened to the missing man, the dead man and where the money has come from.

I picked up this book because:-

1. It had won the Man Booker prize 
2. I liked the idea of a reading a historical fiction set in New Zealand, as I hadn’t read one before.
3. I’m trying read as many of the big books of 2013 as I can.
4. I liked the description of the book
5. I had read many good reviews

From the beginning of the book, I was hooked on the various mysteries.
I found the characters and the descriptions of the country very compelling. 
There are quite a few characters and a lot of overlapping storylines but it was laid out in such a way that I never got confused. 
Every time I thought I’d solved the mystery, there was another part of the story still to be told by someone else that changed everything.
I got a bit confused by all the astrological bits at the front of each chapter, so I ignored them and found doing so did not impact on the story at all! 
Though I did love the little teaser of what was to happen at the beginning of each chapter.
I do normally struggle with big books; however, I was so absorbed in everyone’s story that I didn’t notice the length of this book at all.

So I would say, try this book, even if you are afraid of big books because it’s worth it!

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Welcome to Night Vale

If you are looking for a new podcast, you really need to download Night Vale - it's brilliant! I love walking to work, on a sunny day, listening to the updates about this dark, mysterious, basically creepy town!

Night Vale community radio updates us twice a month with all the comings and goings of Night Vale, a small desert town in the USA. This town, though, is a little bit different to others. There is a non-existent dog park, secret police, a beautiful scientist called Carlos who has everyone under his spell and you do not want to get on the wrong side of the community radio bosses, it could end very badly for you. 

I was in instant fan as I love anything creepy and a little bit weird! I'm not sure what that says about me though!

I found this through the Bookrageous podcast, another podcast I would recommend as well to book lovers.